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Fellowship of the Ring - JRR Tolkien

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sapphireglyphs asked: Do you have any recommendations for vibrators? I know that taste varies from person to person, but I was wondering what's your 2 cents on the topic. :)

Okay so everyone who is into vibrators should definitely get a rabbit (because holy shit) and some kind of wand. You don’t have to get a super expensive one or anything (I think ours was only, like, sixty bucks) but there’s something satisfying about a vibrator that you have to plug into the wall.

Also, it’s good to have a bullet and just a nice, plain vibrator for when you’re not feeling crazy. And if there’s any particular kind of stimulation that you’re into, there are a thousand specialty vibrators out there that you can stick in any and all orifices (although probably don’t put one in your mouth because I don’t think it would be good for your teeth). 

I don’t really have any specific brand recommendations. You can kinda tell what’s quality and what’s not by how much they cost, and I would also advise reading the reviews. You can get a lot of good detail about a product based on what other people complain about. ;)

We get all of our stuff from ExtremeRestraints.com. They’re super accommodating, you get your stuff fast, and it beats going into a sex store! 

Anonymous asked: I possibly maybe kind of like this girl I met on Tumblr. She's hella cute and we think the same about a lot of things and she loves comic books and Pacific Rim. Basically she's a little bit perfect, is what I'm saying. However, she lives in another state, and I haven't actually met her in person. How do you figure out whether someone is actually the kind of person you would date when you can't actually be with them face-to-face?

Well, depending on how far apart you guys are, you could visit her or she could visit you. Sometimes that’s not feasible, though, for various reasons.

Listen, I’m not gonna lie to you, long-distance stuff is hard and weird and you really never do know unless you go for it. I didn’t know if Nicki and I would be a good couple when I told her I was into her, and she didn’t know when she flew over here to meet me. We just had a lot of the same interests and we got along really well and we decided what the hell, let’s give it a try.

And that’s really all you can do. It’s not exactly the same as meeting someone in person and deciding you want to date them, but it’s similar in a lot of ways. How do you know if someone that you met at a bar or a concert or through mutual friends is the kind of person you would date? You just have to think about what you want in a partner and go from there.

If your Tumblr lady has everything you look for in a partner (except for being physically present) and if she’s also interested, you can try the long-distance thing. Having been through it, I can tell you that it’s tough. You have to base the entire relationship on absolutely unshakable trust. If you don’t trust each other, it’s not going to work.

So get to know her, figure out if she gives you that fluttery feeling in your stomach. Decide if you can trust her enough to get emotionally involved. If you can’t, or if you aren’t sure, just let it be a crush. It will go away eventually. But if you can, I say go for it.

Good luck! :)

Anonymous asked: Flatbear said you'll buy me pot and vibrators. So...

I mean…….

I stopped smoking pot a really long time ago because it’s hell on my anxiety, but I will buy you beer. Or liquor. Or cigarettes. Whatever, I’m cool. I just don’t have any weed contacts is all.

But VIBRATORS. Man. I love buying vibrators. I will buy y’all vibrators all day.

Anonymous asked: Can I ask your advice? My manager and I seen like we might be heading into relationship territory but I'm either that if that happens, sex is bound to occur but I'm worried he might not like the way I look naked?? Any advice please and thank you!:)

Oh man, okay.

First of all, you really probably shouldn’t sleep with your boss? I’m assuming that’s what you mean when you say manager, and seriously, sleeping with someone that you work with is just absolutely a bad idea all around. Even if it seems like you can totally handle it (which you probably can, no judgement there!) you’ve got a handful of outcomes and the three most likely are that it doesn’t work out and work is SUPER WEIRD, it DOES work out and everyone else resents that you’re sleeping with the boss and therefore are getting special treatment (whether you are or not), or your manager’s boss finds out and you both get fired.

But, you know, the heart wants what it wants, and if you’re seriously thinking about sleeping with your manager, me being a cautious old lady is probably not going to stop you. ;)

So I’m going to tell you a thing that I have learned over many years and a wide variety of partners and experiences:

If you get to the point of sleeping with someone, to where you’ve both got your clothes off and that shit is happening, I 100% guarantee you that that someone is totally into how you look naked.

See, you have to live in your body, so you notice all of the little weird, gross things about it, and you have little hang-ups and pick at your flaws and are super aware of everything that is wrong with you. And that makes you self-conscious, and that’s totally fine and normal. But the important thing to remember is that EVERYONE LOOKS PRETTY WEIRD WHEN THEY’RE NAKED and also none of us are perfect and everyone has things that they hate about their body.

But if someone is attracted to you, they aren’t going to notice those things. And if they do, they’re not going to care.

For example, I literally never shave my legs except like halfway up my calves. And I am pretty hairy, let me just tell you, and my hair is black as fuck. It looks like I’m wearing capris made of hair, is what I’m telling you. But Nicki is still (inexplicably) willing to have sex with me because she is attracted to me in spite of the weird shit that’s going on with my body when I’m not all dolled up and adorable.

So basically what I’m telling you is don’t stress about it! I know you will because it’s human nature, but I promise, if he is into you enough that he wants to sleep with you, you have nothing to worry about. He already finds you attractive, and taking your clothes off isn’t going to change that. 

Besides, you’ll be mashed together most of the time. ;) Just try to relax and enjoy yourself and remember that he’s probably got some weird body hang-ups of his own. <3 <3

flatbear:

WHAT THE JUNK. You can now buy this print on, well, fukkin everything!

Mugs, shirts, prints, stickers and more. GIVE ME YOUR DOLLARS. GIVE ME YOUR TEARS!

BUY MY WIFE’S STUFF YOU GUYS!!!!!!!

You know you want this on a coffee mug….

fozmeadows:

nothingman:

via http://www.listen-tome.com/save-me/

IT’S 2AM AND I’M LAUGHING WAY TOO LOUD HELP

eternuslibertas:

(yaoi/slash)Captain America:The Winter Soldier by sunsetagain

ballvvasher:

it’s been a rough week for me tbh

givenclarity:

I’ve still got an hour in my time zone I am totally on top on this. 

(and all stitched together why not:

image

samiferist:

GOT Meme
↳ 5/9 Quotes: Stannis Baratheon

I never asked for this crown. Gold is cold and heavy on the head, but so long as I am the king, I have a duty … If I must sacrifice one child to the flames to save a million from the dark … Sacrifice … is never easy, Davos. Or it is no true sacrifice.